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ScuzzBlog: Diaries November 2018

Entry 5th November 2018: Post 01: Joystick Heaven

Joystick Heaven

I have boxes and boxes of joysticks. They litter every corner of
this house. They sit atop computers, monitors and lay in heaps
on collections of kit. Sadly I also have boxes of broken joysticks.
The biggest killer was Sensible Soccer which single handedly was
reason for the death of so many QuickShot Pros. I would take them
to pieces in hope of repair but the metal tangs that broke off
just couldn't be made right.

In the early days it would be the poor old joysticks on the
Spectrum that took a hammering. So pleased was I when I got to
the PlayStation to find a more durable controller.

Joysticks were never the best for control anyway. They were at
best usable, but hardly pleasant or reliable in use. Those tricky
moments when you need the accuracy of control and find you failed
due to the hardware you start to get very angry quickly. I was
playing Duke Nukem on the PC and recall swirling the joystick
above my head and smashing it into the wall. So angry was I.

Enough of that. I recently had cause to empty a box from one of
my store cupboards and came across a really nice Quickshot that
had a very large ball stick and two player large red button on
a generous flat panel unit. I decided then to do a feature on
the actual joystick. I then simply went round the house and picked
up what ever was lying around and this is a photo session of
those joysticks and controllers.

I love the colours sometimes of kit and certainly being able to
find your joystick could be useful in a darkened room. I am not
a great fan I have to say. I have played way way too many games
than I wish to admit. Currently its Warcraft which I have been
playing for ten years on keyboard. Mashing the button and mouse
isn't as rewarding as say the PS3 controller but it is certainly
better than the humble joystick. I have no desire ever to go back to
a joystick. All my Amigas have gamepad style controllers.

Anyway here are a selection of some joysticks. They are neither my
best loved or favoured. However a joystick must satisfy a few
basic rules. It should fit the grip of your hand. Have the buttons
in the one hand grip and operated by one hand. It should be firm
and easy to use though have a sense of full rotation and not just
up down left and right. It helps to have the sticky feet though
in truth I probably would be holding it with my other hand. It
shouldn't be large nor heavy. Mostly its more about the gripstick
and the ease of button pressing. The biggest problem with any
joystick , other than the life expectancy, is the old law of physics
and that is for every action there is an equal and opposite. So if
you push the lever left hard you need an equal reverse pressure
either by you holding the joystick or the suckers holding it to
the table. If at the very point you undertake that simple action
and the opposing pressure is not then you probably will die and
when you play games..... you never want to die.

So here they are... Joystick Heaven. Just a sample. .... I include
also some other controllers and light gun.

Joystick Heaven

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Last updated 5th November 2018

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